Isn’t it really sweet when political correctness collides with political correctness. If you predicted it or made it up no one would believe you, but in real life these wonderful, hilarious things often happen to bite the self-righteous proponents of political correctness in the butt.
Today I am talking about the women guards at Guantanamo Bay, but up until now my favorite had been the seal story in California. The usual contingent of far left environmentalists worked for years claiming that a certain subspecies of seals was so unique and so endangered that it needed its own preserve. Over the protests of local people, commercial fishermen and others, the enviros won the day as they always do.
As expected, the ‘endangered’ seals thrived in their own little bay. Life was wonderful and the human eco-pod patted themselves on the back, and took bows for their selfless work. That is, until the day a curious ‘protected’ killer whale entered the bay and spotted this feast all set out for him. Being a sharing and caring member of ‘one orca family’ he reported his find to his hungry pod. Without going into the gruesome details, nature had its way, and after all their years of battling for the seals, the humans were forced to look for something else to save.
The Guantanamo story is even more delightful. Our modern, diverse, and politically correct military, has run into a major snag. After catering to every whim for a hundred or so Muslim child killers and decapitators, our military is faced with a demand so conflicting that they don’t know what to do. They have supplied the captive terrorists with Korans, special food, traditional clothing, prayer calls, video games, and even virgins for all we know.
Now, after all the nice things our men in arms have done for them, the ungrateful terrorists slap our military brass and our President in the face by demanding that female guards not be allowed to touch them. Yes, even with rubber gloves the unclean women are too tainted to be allowed to touch the sacred, male Muslim bodies. My, my, my, what to do?
Don’t they understand that men and women are the same? Don’t they care about the hurt feelings of the female guards? Don’t they know that we are all just ‘one human family’? Maybe if we show enough empathy, they will agree to a little sensitivity training. Wait, I know! How about we solve the problem by letting them all go!
Well whatever, the sensitivity gurus in our compassionate military had better come up with a solution soon, because the delicate sensibilities of the ladies are suffering more by the minute. The prowling lawyers have already sniffed out gender discrimination, and there’s going to be some mighty rich privates in our army.
